Brandon Regrets
Brandon Regrets
#90 · Bad Tattoo Tony
The Brandon Regrets had the Jets. Lost 'em. Got 'em back. Still sad. Still showing up at The Existential Dread Center in temperatures that would end a normal person, wearing this jersey like it's both armor and a coping mechanism. Remorse the Shivering Jet has seen things. Bad Tattoo Tony #90 understands. Frozen tears are blue raspberry.
Jersey Junkies is a parody. Not affiliated with or endorsed by any real team, league, or player. All names and designs are fictional and satirical.
Designed by
View full profile →Dean Doucette “The Dekekeeper”
A fictional hands coach whose playing career ended the second he discovered he loved naming colorways more than finishing on the breakaway.
Hometown: Lewiston, Maine
Style: Offbeat mascots, internet-goblin themes, and logo ideas born from equal parts caffeine and locker-room dares.
Favorite chirp: “Congrats on the effort, champ. The effort was not good, but congrats on locating it.”
Missing teeth: 32
Postgame snack: Mini donuts in a paper helmet full of fries
Add your name and number on the back for +$5.00 — or leave blank to keep the default player.
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Printed to order
Every jersey is custom printed when you order it. Production takes 3–5 business days.
Ships to US & Canada
Standard shipping is 7–14 business days after production. Total: roughly 2–3 weeks.
Defect & misprint guarantee
If your jersey arrives damaged, defective, or misprinted, we’ll replace it free. See policy.
Real humans, real support
Questions? Email orders@jerseyjunkies.io — we reply within 1–2 business days.
Product details
- • 100% recycled polyester knit
- • Lightweight, breathable, moisture-wicking
- • Full sublimation all-over print — front, back, and sleeves
- • Crew neck with reinforced stitching
