Springfield Booze
Springfield Booze
#55 · Bourbon Bill
The Springfield Booze pour one out — then pour another — at The Open Bar Center, where Bourbon the Blues-Singing Bear holds court and toasted ravioli comes standard with a bourbon dipping sauce. The fanbase considers Budweiser a personality trait, and it's earned. Their rivalry with Worcester is deeply personal. Pour. Another.
Jersey Junkies is a parody. Not affiliated with or endorsed by any real team, league, or player. All names and designs are fictional and satirical.
Designed by
View full profile →Randy Rutledge “Half Shield”
A fictional video-session menace who never met a cream-colored away kit or an overcomplicated chest stripe he could not defend with fake analytics.
Hometown: Burlington, Vermont
Style: Clean vintage palettes, throwback symmetry, and just enough nonsense to make old guys in the lobby mutter approvingly.
Favorite chirp: “You skate like your controller batteries are dying, pal.”
Missing teeth: 5
Postgame snack: Microwaved arena pretzel with too much mustard
Add your name and number on the back for +$5.00 — or leave blank to keep the default player.
Custom jerseys are final sale. Please double-check spelling before checkout.
Name (max 14 chars)
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Secure checkout
Encrypted payment via Stripe. We never see your card details.
Printed to order
Every jersey is custom printed when you order it. Production takes 3–5 business days.
Ships to US & Canada
Standard shipping is 7–14 business days after production. Total: roughly 2–3 weeks.
Defect & misprint guarantee
If your jersey arrives damaged, defective, or misprinted, we’ll replace it free. See policy.
Real humans, real support
Questions? Email orders@jerseyjunkies.io — we reply within 1–2 business days.
Product details
- • 100% recycled polyester knit
- • Lightweight, breathable, moisture-wicking
- • Full sublimation all-over print — front, back, and sleeves
- • Crew neck with reinforced stitching
